Unless you have been living under a rock somewhere you already know George Carlin has left us. HBO is running some of his concerts at night and I happened to catch a few one last night and thought to myself…….”Self, this man is one of the reasons I have days that I do random rants! I wish I could rant the way he does, but in my defense, he was at it longer than I have been!” So in honor of the man who lead me to my random rants, I give you a few rants to carry home with you and think about. As George once said, “I don’t have “pet peeves” I have psychotic, scary ass hates!”
What happened to a a little campaign from a few years ago, it went something like ,”BUY AMERICAN, KEEP AMERICANS IN JOBS!!!!” Then they went about quietly closing down American businesses! Run with my train of thought for a minute. If the campaign Buy American caused so many plants to shut down…..shouldn’t we then try a campaign like, ” BUY EVERYTHING FROM CHINA!! WHAT’S A LITTLE LEAD AMONGST FRIENDS!” If buy American can close down plants here, just maybe!!!!
What the hell is it with all of the recalls these days? We did not have these when I was growing up! I know this because if we did I would have been pissed! Think about it, if your parents took your favorite toy away, wouldn’t you be pissed? Are kids just more special now or do we just like our kids better than our parents liked us?
Lead paint…..I grew up with lead paint around, I am sure of it. I bet most of you did too. I seem to be a rational, normal person……….. Wait forget I said that, I may not be rational or normal!
What happened to the days when you bought a toy because the kid screamed whined wanted it and you didn’t have to look for the age limits?! Are we a group of people who are too stupid to realize you don’t give a marble to a toddler? Small+toddler= stupid adult!
Can we no longer think for ourselves? Does the government just KNOW we are too stupid? Or that possibly we just don’t care? George thought natural selection was a wonderful thing. Maybe stupid people shouldn’t have children! I realize there are plenty of highly intelligent people who want kids and can’t have them, my train of thought does not apply to you!!! *You know who you are, because you are smart enough to know I am not talking about you! If on the other hand you are questioning whether or not I am talking about you…….*
Politics, should I hit politics? OK just for a minute. I still think I should run for office! I make a lot of good points here! Now that you have been over there…..Do you still like me? I stand by every rant there! At some point I said I would run for president, so there is my political rant!
I won’t touch religion! I am one of those people who knows there is a God, knows he loves me, but fears pissing him off!!!! And other religions…….I don’t want to piss off any body’s God! I can’t afford to piss off Gods on a daily basis, I have enough problems!
I have seen a few articles on new art. I know it surprised me too! What happened to paintings where you know it is a cow in a field? You know the ones that you didn’t have to look at for hours to figure out what the hell it is! I know that kind has been around for years but I get this….
But this gives me a headache!!….
And when the hell did smearing shit on a piece a paper become art? Or welding a few pipes together together? I know different strokes for different folks! Just my opinion!
Why do kids look for loopholes in every rule? Don’t jump off the deck into the pool suddenly means climb onto the wall of the pool and jump from there! Or don’t rough house in the pool suddenly becomes they walked away for a minute, how rough can we get! And finally Don’t jump off the pool ladder, means you can stand on the ladder and fall forward!
And while I am on kids…..Why is it when you brag on a child they will immediately screw up? I bragged that Little Miss had actually turned off her TV and went to bed. Last night…..Let’s just say she found that loophole and because I didn’t physically go in and turn off the TV and tell her to sleep, the TV was on til 11 and it took me until almost 12 to realize I actually had to tell her to go to sleep, not just go to bed!!!
There really should be an age limit on having the last child! I could have handled Little Miss when I was 25, but now I am to damn old and tired to raise her! I just don’t have the energy to fight with her. The boys I could whip their ass and go on to whatever I wanted to do. If I whooped her ass, I would have to take a nap!
And what is it to others whether I whip my child or not? I can see if it were clearly abuse, but a smack to the ass never killed me! All this, it will teach them aggression bullshit gets on my nerves! They will learn that from the classroom bully in kindergarten! I had my ass whooped too many times to count, I am somewhat rational as an adult! I am not sitting in a tower with a Sniper’s rifle picking off people! Not yet anyway and if I end up there it will not be because my parent’s whooped my ass, it will be because someone pissed me off!! I am not saying beat your children! But for crying out loud, if the first thought in your mind is that kid would act better if someone whooped his ass, maybe he should have his ass whooped!
I say teach a kid respect for themselves, others and for their elders but teach them to take up for themselves!!! No I am not advocating teaching your child to kick ass if someone looks at them crooked. All I am saying is teach them to tell others who piss them off to kiss their ass! Well, not in those words but you get the picture. I don’t know how many times I have heard a parent say, I have got to talk to the teacher/principal because X,Y and Z won’t be nice to my little Suzy! She wants to be X,Y and Z’s friend, but they will not play with her. Well, maybe X,Y and Z know Suzy is a brat! Or maybe little angel Suzy is the bully! Parents have taught children to come whine to them at the drop of a hat. And parents are quick to jump to conclusions! Always and I say ALWAYS find out if your kid started it! There is nothing worse than bitching about something and finding out your kid was at fault!
I can honestly say, when Little Miss comes whining to me about someone being mean to her, the first question out of my mouth is, ” What did you do to them?” Hey, I know my kid is no angel! I am not blind to her ways! I do believe a child should tell a parent if it is big or ongoing, but just because little Bitsy won’t share her apple with little Suzy is not a reason to go ape shit crazy on the school! Maybe little Bitsy was hungry, maybe it was her breakfast, or just maybe little Suzy demanded it not asked for a wee bite!!!
On to another topic now that I have pissed off every parent in the world with an angel for a child!
Health insurance…… How is it they raise the rates but lower what they pay! We just got a rate increase and then got notice that there were a few changes, they would be paying less for services and the deductible will be going up. If I do less work do I get paid more? Why hell no! So why should they get better pay to do less? Just wondering.
There should be an IQ portion on the driver’s test! A few days ago I was sitting in my car, the idiot lady in the car ahead of me was painting her nails, the light turned green and I waited the customary split second before I gave her the get your head out of your ass and pay attention honk and do you know what she did? Did she go? Why hell no! She waved at me like I was some long lost fucking friend! It came as no surprise to me, though apparently it was a surprise to her, she damn near caused a wreck when she gassed it when the light went red! So see IQ test!!!
And just so this isn’t all doom and gloom…..I love Caller ID!!! I no longer have to lie to people on the phone! I can look at the Caller ID and think to myself, Nope not home! Where before I had to answer it and then say, No she isn’t here right now. Can I take a message? See what a wonderful invention! And how many of you actually write down a number when you know they won’t be called back? As in a bill collector calls and you lie and say you aren’t home, they ask you to take down a number and have you call them ASAP. Do you actually write down the number? I mean if you were going to talk to them, why lie and say you aren’t home!
Which leads me to this gripe. Caller ID! I can no longer not return a call and say I didn’t know you called because there it is right there on the Caller ID!!! How many times have you known someone called and told them the answering machine ate the message? Or that your child erased the messages before you heard them? Or that hey your kid/ husband is an ass and forgot to give you the message? Not anymore, not with the invention of Caller ID! Because unless you are one of those people who delete the calls as soon as they come in, there it is! And if you delete the calls as soon as they come in, you answered the damn phone so there is no need in calling them back! I have tried the battery must be dead and it didn’t pick it up, but Caller ID is on my phone, so how can I be using a phone that is dead? Damn its a wash, I have to lie less and to lie more! I am just screwed!
So had enough? I have more but Little Miss and the Hellions require my attention at the pool. See why the loophole rant? So as it is Friday, I will see you again on Monday. Have a great weekend! Until next time…..
HAVE A GREAT DAY AND THANKS FOR VISITING!!!!!
